If you’ve ever been clueless as to how you should approach someone, or been lost for words half way through a conversation, then congratulations, you’re human.
We all have difficulties talking to and relating to one another. And it’s in our nature to worry about what other people think and be conscious of how we’re coming across.
The only difference between socialites who can dazzle a room of people and those who can’t even talk to their mom is a little skill and practice.
Get started building your social skills today with our eight tips for talking to anyone which, if employed correctly, will work for even the most introverted and shy recluse.
1. Listen
Instead of starting a conversation by saying something about yourself, how about asking the other person something and really listening? it’s far better to listen first and talk second. It makes for a more invested and engaging conversation in which the other person is not always worrying or thinking about what to say next.
2. Stay in The Loop
There’s always something to say, a lot of the time it’s just knowing where to start. For most students, this is with the news, gossip, current affairs, campus politics, and whatever else happens to be going on. Stay in the loop and in touch with the grapevine and you’ll never be short of ways to make new friends and get a conversation flowing.
3. Use Empathetic Reflection
One of the most effective and easiest tips for talking to anyone and, crucially, understanding them, is repeating to them in your own words what they just said to you. As well as showing them that you’re listening, it also allows the other person to direct what you heard in a more precise way to better reflect what they’re thinking and feeling.
4. Don’t Judge
Not judging people is something you get good at when you listen and understand what they’re saying with empathy. You’ll find that things are not always what they seem, and that when you’re having a conversation with someone you’ll be much more receptive and less likely to make snap judgements.
5. Talk Nonverbally
Words can only say so much, and we communicate so much more meaning through our body language and the gestures we make. By being aware of what the other person is doing with their eyes, posture, gestures, and hands, you can therefore get a better idea of when the convo needs to shift gears, when you need to walk away, and when you should dive deeper.
6. Learn From Every Chat
No conversation ever goes badly — if you learn from it. The only way we learn to be better communicators is through practice, and so look at every interaction as a way of improving your skills and broadening your perspective. In this way, you’ll know the next conversation will always be better than the last.
7. Don’t Share Too Much
You want to be open enough to keep someone engaged, but you don’t want to be so open you scare them away. If you ever have doubt and think you’re going too far, put yourself in their shoes; you’ll likely realise there’s a time and place for personal secrets and that maybe this is, or isn’t, it.
8. Don’t Be Quick To Agree
Some of the most interesting conversations come out of disagreements. Yet we are a nation of people pleasers and thus tend to stick to the safety of going along with general thoughts and opinions. Don’t assume agreement is what the other person wants, and likewise, that they agree and feel the same way as you do.
